“Attitude is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than what people do or say.  It is more important than appearance, giftedness, or skill.  The remarkable thing is, we have a choice everyday regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past.  We cannot change the fact that people act in a certain way.  We cannot change the inevitable.  The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude.” 

The above quote by Charles Swindoll is one of my favorites. Sometimes you’re not in control of anything happening in your life except your attitude!

Following is a simple, yet powerful, technique I use with clients to help them shift from negative self-talk on a subject to a more positive viewpoint.

Building Positive Self Talk

• Keep a notebook with you for a few days. Write down your most frequent negative thoughts.


• When you’re in a good mood, begin to counter some of those thoughts with positive ones. Write them down! You may want to ask a good friend, coach or therapist to help you with this.


• When you’re in a bad mood, look at your good mood responses!


• Be gentle with yourself. Isn’t it the height of absurdity to hate and do battle with your own inner critic? “I just had a negative thought. Out! Out! damn thought!”


• Do something fun to switch the channel on negativity. Take a walk. Call a friend. Rent a funny movie. Go out to dinner. Go bowling. Watch people. Read a good book. Try something new.


• Don’t take yourself or the situation too seriously. Things have a way of changing for the better.


• Answer the question “What does my life (or this situation) look like when it’s successful?”


• Build your self-esteem by taking a risk, something that requires a little courage. Acknowledge and reward yourself for doing it.

Sometimes all that’s standing between you and the great life you want and deserve are a few negative beliefs and perceptions. When you feel insecure and inadequate, begin to see it as a message from your own Spirit that you’re thinking too small. Your inner wisdom is challenging you to try new things and move in creative directions and is simply showing you where change is needed. It’s a wonderful world waiting for you.  Have courage and embrace the change. Mighty forces gather around you and whisper words of encouragement. Open your mind and listen.